1645) I heard three words recently which engaged powerfully with my heart and mind. The three words were, I don’t know. Let me briefly tell you the context.
I was driving to school recently and was crossing a bridge when I met three deer at the highest point of the structure, clearly anxious about what they perceived as danger. I stopped my car, but that wasn’t enough. The deer in the lead went to the edge of the bridge and jumped over the rail and to my horror, I watched the other two follow.
It was a long way to the water, and I heard splashes. The temperature was in the teens. I got out of my car and ran to the rail. I looked down, but it was too dark to see anything. I heard frantic splashes. I leaned against the rail and cried. I haven’t been able to get the scene out of my head. It was very upsetting.
I was describing to someone I highly respect what I saw earlier that day, tears running down my face. I asked an agonizing question many of us have asked. I said, Why didn’t God stop them from jumping off? I braced myself, afraid I would hear some religious platitude that would not have been helpful in the moment. Instead, I heard three words. I don’t know.
Why did these three words make such a difference to me? Because they shouted to me that I was not alone in my hurt and my struggle. Yes, we could have talked about the love of God and using our faith to work through this and I did these things later. BUT at the moment, I don’t know was what I needed to hear.
Romans 11:34-36 tells us we do not know the mind of God and when life throws us pain, hurt and difficulties, I may not know the “Whys” of God’s actions and it’s ok to say to one another, I don’t know.
Dare to say these three words.
P.S. Just to calm myself even as I write this, I want to add that my husband went down later and saw no dead deer. We hope they made it out.