1007) As a Christian, I find boundaries are a tough subject. Why? Because I read a lot about “self care” and “giving yourself a voice” and more. What is tricky to me is the drawing of the line between healthy boundaries and selfishness.

Is it selfish for me to desire a mutually satisfying relationship? Is it selfish to not allow people to take advantage of me? Is it selfish to say “no” to some requests that come my way? The answers to these for me are “maybe.”

Romans 13:8-10 tells us again to love our neighbors as ourselves but does this mean that we allow our relationships to be one-sided? No. Does it mean that we allow others to take advantage of us? No. Does it mean that saying “no” is selfish? Not necessarily. These things help sustain healthy boundaries for ourselves; it also allows self-respect.

Loving our neighbor as we love ourselves means that we also recognize their boundaries. This is how we can show respect to others.

Many times, protecting boundaries is necessary. That doesn’t mean you have to be cruel in your words to others. It’s often not what you say, but how you say it.

Love your neighbor as yourself.